One recent evening our doorbell rang at about 8:00 p.m. You’re probably thinking what I was thinking: “Who rings someone’s doorbell at 8:00 p.m.?” I was in the back room and thought maybe Karen had locked herself out of the house.
Our dog was jumping up and down at the front door so I grabbed her to put her somewhere else so I could answer the door because now I had to answer it. Our door has glass in the middle and on either side. I saw the salesman and he saw me. Stupid glass door!
Outside was a young man selling storm windows for homes. He asked if I’d want to schedule an estimate. I told him it didn’t matter what the estimate was because we would not have the money for the storm windows. He said we could finance it and I told him we like to stay out of debt.
He said if I gave him my phone number they could call and check in with us in a few months to see if we had changed our minds. I said if he’d give me his phone number I’d call him during the evening when he was relaxing at home. Not really. I just told him I saw the number on the flyer he handed me and we’d call if we decided we needed storm windows.
Then I said, “So, I noticed your accent while you were talking. Where are you from?” He replied, “From Egypt.” I said, “I know a guy who spent some time there when he was a young child. His parents had to hide out there for a while.” (OK. Maybe I just thought that. But it would have been a great line!) I asked, “How long have you been in America?”
“Three years,” he said. We talked a bit more and then he asked for a bottle of water, which we usually have, but didn’t that night. I shook his hand and wished him well.
When I went back inside Karen told me our neighborhood Facebook page was full of chatter about the guys going door to door. Already the police and Constable had been called. Some said they were upset with someone coming to their door at that hour of the evening, especially with recent stories of abductions home invasions circulating.
Honestly, I don’t like people coming to my door any time after I get home either, so I understood my neighbors. Sometimes we close the door on strangers due to fear. Sometimes we close the door on our neighbors due to our fears too.
Jesus taught us to overcome our fears and love our neighbors. As we watch him we learn. For example, he called Matthew to follow him and then Matthew threw a party with his friends and invited Jesus. See what can happen? Jesus did not have our fears but we discover a principle with his relationship with Matthew: overcoming our fear of connecting with one person might open the door to other friendships.
But fear of what others think about the people we spend time with might keep us from being good neighbors too. The Pharisees and scribes—the religious people of the day—complained to Jesus’ disciples that Jesus was eating and drinking with “tax collectors and sinners” at Matthew’s party.
Some people God places in our way may not get the approval of some church people. Don’t be concerned about their approval. The only approval Jesus looked for was the approval of the Father. Fear of what others might think can keep us from people Jesus would welcome. So how do we overcome our fears? Here are some practical pointers that may help.
- Pray and ask God to help you overcome any fear you may have and replace it with love. Fear of the other person is overcome by love for the other person.
- Hang out where you can meet others. Jesus was in the marketplace, at the temple, in the village…places where he could see people and get to know them.
- Give invitations. Jesus did. He said, “Follow me.” “Come and see.” He opened up his life to others. Learn to invite people to your house. You might just start with one neighbor. Like Matthew, they might open the door to others.
- Accept invitations. Jesus did. To weddings. To houses. To parties. If you get invited, go!
Let’s face our fears of getting to know our neighbors. And let’s learn to be the ones who know how to throw the best parties in our community.
Question: What fear keeps you from getting to know those who live near you?