How to Find Time for Your Neighbor

It had us at hello. No, not some corny line from a movie. The iPhone. On June 29, 2007, the iPhone appeared on the scene and quickly made its way into our hands and spread faster than a California wild fire.

The iPhone basically changed everything. It improved our predictions of what you will find a group of people doing in public places: looking down at their mobile device. Within six years most Americans owned one. It has allowed us to find our way around towns or on trips. With it we can find places to eat and hotels to stay in.

But an advance in technology may have ushered in a decline in relational abilities. Sociologist Sherry Turkle uses the phrase “the alone together phenomenon” to describe what has happened.  Whereas in the beginning of the iPhone age people would huddle together and show each other what was on their phones, now they just look at their individual phones, sucked into whatever world they are seeing on their screen.

Interestingly enough, all of our time saving devices that have entered our homes and workplaces since the iPhone have not saved us time. They have only led us to pack more things into our already busy lives. Ours days are full. Our weekends are full. We live at a pace that leaves us little time to be available for our neighbors who live the closest in proximity to us.

Martha did not have an iPhone, but she had the similar issues. Martha and her sister Mary invited Jesus to their home for a meal (Luke 10). Mary sits at the feet of Jesus while Martha takes care of the house and meal. Martha is “distracted by her many tasks.”

Put yourself in her apron. She’s busy taking care of and serving Jesus. She’s busy. She needs another set of hands to help. And she looks over and Mary is just sitting there at the feet of Jesus. So she does what most of us mature adults would do: she complains to Jesus.

Here’s what he said to her. “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has made the right choice, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Martha get reprimanded for serving while Mary get praised for sitting. In the Hebrew culture to sit at someone’s feet indicates a relationship between a disciple and a teacher.  In that culture, however, women were not students. They were supposed to be in the kitchen being a good hostess. Mary bucked the societal norms to be with Jesus.

We will have to do the same to be with Jesus too. Sometimes being with Jesus means being alone and quiet so we can hear his voice. We need times like that.

But sometimes being with Jesus has to do with being with people like our neighbors. There are many things we can do. But there is one thing that is necessary. Even if it means going against the busy lives we think everyone else is living to be where Jesus has called us to be.

If iPhones have not helped us do this, what will? As Dallas Willard once said, “We have to ruthlessly eliminate hurry from our lives.” Three things will help:

  • First, make the main thing the main thing. Jesus told Martha there were “many things” and “one thing.” The “one thing,” or the “main thing,” is being with Jesus. Make him first in your schedule.
  • Second, eliminate time wasters. If you need some help try these: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, watching TV, surfing the web, or playing video games. My guess is no one will say these are vital to their lives. They’re not evil. They just don’t add much. We need to chip away the excess in our lives so the true beauty can be seen. Jesus saw beauty in God and people. When we eliminate time wasters we free ourselves for both of them.
  • And finally, be interruptible. Jesus was. He had as much to accomplish as any of us. But he had time for interruptions: children, blind beggars, Centurions and a Samaritan woman to name a few. We may need to control some interruptions to a degree, but what if we can eliminate hurry to the point that when a neighbor has time to chat we see that as a divine appointment instead of a disruptive moment.

Face time—not the kind on your iPhone—with your neighbors is proven to bring you happiness.

Question: How can you “ruthlessly eliminate hurry” from your life today?

 

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